Also, wonderful article. I have only had once lap dance in my life, and I remember it like the back of my hand as a very strange experience. The stripper wasn’t as great of a person as the one you met. She keep saying things like “oh my! I think someone is watching!” and I wasn’t really into it.

But yeah, great article! Thanks.

I will also check out that book, thank you!

I invite you to read “Women of the Light,” a great book on women who are sex workers from various Paths who are bringing healing energy in this area.

Blessings for your post.

When you open your heart and you open your mind you can meet the most amazing people anywhere you go!

It don’t always find it easy to articulate my feelings that well but I will give it a go. To answer your question I would say that my learning came down to the treatment of human beings as a whole. In the beginning, I treated her one way, just as a lap dancer. After I got to know her, suddenly it didn’t seem right to have the dynamic of her as just someone who was there to give me physical pleasure. What changed from the before and after states? It was the getting to know her. However that was not a sufficient enough reason for me to treat her different and as far as I’m concerned should never be the case! From now on, whether it be a lap dancer or a taxi driver or any other kind of stranger, I will remember to treat that person as if I’ve know them for a long time, treat them as a long lost friend.

Does that make sense?

That to me was the prime lesson but the impact was immense becausue in the beginning, after the conversation with her, I felt a deep connection. Then, for her to strip naked and give me a dance, it was a feeling I haven’t experienced before and it will stay with me for a very long time to come, probably my whole life! It wasn’t even a feeling a guilt, it was almost of deep feeling of hurt and anger at myself that I’d treated a friend that way.

Thanks for your comments and I’m glad you asked the question!

While I was reading the story, I was trying to decipher what you learned from it? Unless I missed it, what was it that you learned? I understand that you found beauty in a person who could have been judged as a “dumb lap dancer” or something like that. Was that it? Did you learn not to judge someone based on their appearance? Or was it something else? I’m curious!

“The doctor may give us a cure, but treat us with no respect for who we are. The streetwalker may prostitute her body, but genuinely care about her client. In which of these examples is the presence of God closer?” –

That actually reminds me a lot of a statement I made in one of my other blog posts –

“In my humble opinion, it’s better to eat junk food with love and appreciation than it is to eat healthy food with guilt!”

To answer your question directly, I would say the prostitute for sure, but it would also depend on the true deep intent within each of those examples, under which the action was taken.

I do understand the deeper message of your statement and it’s something I do consider in many, but not all, interactions. I wish I could say I was an A student at creating a deep spiritual connection with each person that I encounter but I know in all honesty that it’s only in the smaller percentile. Hand on heart, where I do remember, I do attempt to forge that connection.

Thank you again James, your message has inspired me to action!

As a casual visitor to your blog, I was struck by this story – and just wanted to leave one observation.

Think of how many people – who are not lap-dancers – we meet every day who we make no connection with. Maybe we stop to buy a ticket or a paper from them, day after day. Neither we nor they bring anything else to that transaction – it’s impersonal, and just about the swapping of goods or services for money.

Then think of a man visiting a prostitute. He pays her for sex – she needs his money. But he never fails to see her as a wonderful, unique, beautiful human being – the manifestation of the Divine. The two connect, even though the circumstances of their connection is unusual.

Between these two extremes most of our transactions with other people are arranged – the chat with the barman, who shares something about his life, or the smile from the hot-dog vendor, which reaches across that gulf of separation.

Looking at all these examples, it’s possible to see that we’re not demeaned by the circumstances of an encounter with another person. What demeans us is how we treat that other person – whether we choose to ignore their humanity and transact with them in an impersonal way, or whether we use the moment to form a connection. The doctor may give us a cure, but treat us with no respect for who we are. The streetwalker may prostitute her body, but genuinely care about her client. In which of these examples is the presence of God closer?

WELCOME
to the Personal Development Carnival- June 10, 2007 edition!
I want to send out a Thank You to my friend Lyman Reed for again allowing me to host. It really is fun! If you would like to enjoy this great opportunity at your blog, you can go …

You know, if I see a stripper or a prostitute who really enjoys what they do, more power to them! I see nothing wrong with it. What I found wrong was in my actions considering the example I’m trying to set not only through this blog but through all the community work I do and the word I do with children, even if they never see me, what example does it set. Not a good one for sure.

I genuinely saw a few lap dancers who really enjoyed what they did and I saw some who, you could tell, were there out of necessity. It is those ones that I have the most compassion for.

But you’re so right, even if she consciously doesn’t acknowledge it, I do accept that the impact is as great for her as it is for me.

Thanks again Mital especially for your honesty, that takes true strength my friend!

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It’s amazing how sometimes we encounter a person for a short period of time but they leave you with something that lasts a lifetime.

God bless you Amit and keep doing what your doing!

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