The 7 Big Illusions In Life

by Amit Sodha

in Personal Growth

Illusions

Illusions hold you back. They stop you from striving forward and making leaps and bounds towards fulfilling all of your hopes and desires.

There are 7 specific illusions and I promise you will recognise at least two, out of the seven, that you will have used on yourself within the past month.

Read through them carefully and understand them. Wake up and recognise when you start using them to break that pattern of thinking.

1. I will do something when I have more time…

This is a massive one. A common statement I hear people make is ‘I’ll get to it when I have the time. I’ll meet you when I have the time.’ Etc. There is no such thing as ‘I don’t have the time’. If something is important to you, you automatically make the time.

It’s probably the biggest of the 7 illusions that still plagues humanity. You don’t necessarily have to be honest with other people to the level where it hurts their feelings, but do be 100% honest with yourself. What is the real reason you’re not making time for someone or something?

2. I will get there faster if I…

You will never reach your destination any quicker than you are supposed to. When you do reach a milestone it will have happened exactly how it should have happened. You can try all you want but those efforts are a part of the enjoyment of the journey.

They make reaching the destination that much sweeter. When you try all you marketing techniques, your strategies your tactics, let go of the outcome and allow them to unfold naturally.

3. I have control over…

You have control over nothing except your own mind. Our spirit has access to this world through the mind in the same way that we plug into the phone socket to get internet access. Now that the tool is available to you what you do with it is up to you. You control nothing except your own mind.

Even then, the best use of that tool is release. When you let go amazing things happen.

4. I will be happy if…

I still hear this old chestnut. People still hold the illusion that if X happens then I will be happy. No you won’t! If you haven’t developed your mental perception to see the reason for happiness now, or just the happiness of being, nothing will change the way you feel.

You may temporarily be happy by winning the lottery but unless you understand how to manage it you will be pulled in all sorts of directions. People may want to borrow money. You may worry about being robbed of your wealth.

Whatever your situation is now, be happy. Even if it changed drastically for the better, If you weren’t happy in the first place, I very much doubt that you’ll be happy after the change.

5. I can change others…

When you try to change other people they will often resist the change. Unless you understand how to communicate in their value system, and inspire them to change themselves, you will always be stuck trying to change them according to your values.

You can never change a person. You can however change the way you see them. When you change the way you perceive them they will change in your eyes without them actually changing.

6. I will go and do this when…

A perfect example of this is in one of my older articles called Going It Alone and the part about being and IGUIG (I’ll go if you go) kind of person. Do you stop yourself from doing the things you really want to do until the circumstances are just right? What if they are never right, does that mean you’ll never go and do it?

In the case of that article I talked about doing things alone. When you do that you’re not waiting for circumstances to be perfect. You just do it anyway and that is the best place to be in.

7. I’ll start exercising when I have more energy…

This one really does embody the term self fulfilling prophecy or vicious cycle. It’s ironic and I’ve seen this with so many people. They think they’ll undertake an exercise regime when they have more energy. What they don’t realise is that they will get more energy from exercising.

So unless they take that first step they are very unlikely to get the increase in energy that they’re hoping for.

Are there any illusions holding you back?

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jarrod - Cultivating Heroes

Reading this I felt like so much of it can be handled if we believe that we are the sole source of our actions and our feelings/happiness full stop. No else truly has a say in them.
New at Jarrod – Cultivating Heroes\’s blog post ..Kill Productivity and Unleash Your Awesomeness

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2 Amit Sodha

Indeed and well said Jarrod. Other people do shake it but ultimately it’s up to me to restore that balance.

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3 Jarrod - Cultivating Heroes

Reading this I felt like so much of it can be handled if we believe that we are the sole source of our actions and our feelings/happiness full stop. No else truly has a say in them.

If someone else has a say in our feelings and actions then it is only because we have chosen to let that be so.
New at Jarrod – Cultivating Heroes\’s blog post ..Kill Productivity and Unleash Your Awesomeness

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4 amie sugat

not anymore, especially after reading this post.

better comment to come, but its 4 am and i need to get to bed.

;)

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5 Amit Sodha

LOL look forward to it!

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6 Eduard @ People Skills Decoded

Yeah, I bet you could do a 100 big illusions post Amit. I’m willing to chip in ;)

The one about changing others really got my attention cause I have a couple of people like that around me. And this belief turns out to be not only unrealistic. but also very frustrating for them and for the people they’re trying to change. Like I often say: other people are not your puppets. You can only influence them.

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7 Amit Sodha

Eduard, brilliant idea, co-authored post. I’m totally game too! Lets do it!

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8 Roman Soluk

Very true points, Amit! We want to achieve something in our life, but we find some excuses all the time, and because of it we fail.

Thanks for sharing this!

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9 Amit Sodha

Excuses is the key word there Roman, we’ve all been hit by them but recognising them is the main skill.

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10 Milan Bakrania

Very true! Point 3 is particularly interesting, I’ve always said if you are happy then the world feeds off this vibe and changes but that should not be confused with control, it’s only a reaction or by-product of your mind.

These ‘illusions’ have been holding people back for centuries. It’s as if years of conditioning have created a lazy-like mentality among people, hence, ‘I don’t have time’, ‘I’ll do X when Y happens’ etc. Time to get up and smell the illusion! : )

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11 amie sugat

I so very much agree! here is me hitting the “like” button!

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12 Amit Sodha

I like the end of that Milan, a new saying for your books! ;-)

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13 amie sugat

You can only influence people who are willing to be influenced, you can only change people who are ready for change, you can only inspire people looking for inspiration. the point is, you both have to be ready, you both have to be willing, and you both have to agree.

“If you want more time you will have to make it,” Michael S Clouse

I remember watching a documentary on a girl who had autism. She was standing over a sink playing with the water as it came pouring out of the faucet. She said, “I am reacting to the water as the water reacts to me.”

From that I learned/concluded We cannot control how others, things, our perceptions, others perceptions, or the universe will react to our actions, we can only interact with it when we perceive it interacts with us.

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14 Amit Sodha

I love that little anecdote of the autistic girl…only the kind of answer a child can give!

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15 amie sugat

Thinking about synchronicity, I follow several blogs every day. funny thing is, those I look to as inspirations sometimes synchronize. Your blog often synchronizes with:

projecthappilyeverafter.com
sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/
positivityblog.com

Not every on he same day, though it has happened, but usually within the same week.month you all will have similar posts. Its amusing!

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16 Amit Sodha

wow, keen observation Amie. It’s interesting to hear you mention that because I notice those events too but hearing it from an outsider makes me realise it’s not just me seeing those patterns.

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17 Preeti @ Heart and Mind

Amit,

Great points, only thing we can change is our self, not others. I have done all of it and still do it occasionally :-)

How is life treating you?
New at Preeti @ Heart and Mind\’s blog post ..The 7 link challenge

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18 Amit Sodha

Hey Preeti, I’m good and yes, I’m guilty of them too! I’m still going to do that 7 Link challenge too so thank you for the reminder! :-D

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19 Nea | Self Improvement Saga

This is a wonderful, eye-opening post Amit. These illusions have a major role in the unhappiness that many people experience. And by the way…you really got me with #7. I’ve declared so many times that I’ll exercise when I have more energy. Talk about fooling yourself!
New at Nea | Self Improvement Saga\’s blog post ..Self Improvement Techniques to Reshape Your World

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20 Amit Sodha

I’ve been there too Nea and It’s easy to fool ourself, breaking out is hard to do but once you start to realise, it gets a bit easier!

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21 Topi

I’m guilty of all 7, does that mean I’m in trouble, or is insight the first step to overcoming ;)
Topi
New at Topi\’s blog post ..Its never too early to learn to live in the moment!

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22 Amit Sodha

I think we’re all guilty of them Topi but you are spot on as you’ve realised them with insight, so you’re cool and you can join the club! ;-)

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23 Jaclyn

Loved reading this!

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24 Amit Sodha

Glad you enjoyed Jaclyn!

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25 Sandra Lee

Hi Amit,

This is a really good post! My favorite: “You have control over nothing except your own mind.” This is a profound truth and it gives me a glimpse into the real you.
New at Sandra Lee\’s blog post ..The Web of Love and 5 Beautiful Bloggers

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26 Amit Sodha

Hey Sandra, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic and your appreciation of that point. It’s always great to establish that we thinking on the same lines.

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