In my last article I talked about keeping in touch with people. Another complaint I hear often from friends and coaching clients is that, despite there being so many means of communication, they feel more lonely than ever.
In this day and age of mass media everyone wants to become a superstar, They want to get noticed and be in the limelight.
You know what they say about fame right? It’s the most lonely profession of all.
In our quest for recognition it can become all too easy to forget about other people and pay attention the the subtle signs that maybe all they need is an ear.
Because of all this mass communication something that has been lost in our ability to communicate more clearly. The kind of subtle and deep communication that we perhaps had 20 years ago when we weren’t so engrossed in all this easy access entertainment.
If you’re one of those people who may have neglected their friends. Notice the subtle signs that maybe they’re going through a tough time.
Here’s some things to look out for.
1. They’ve gone quiet and shut themselves away.
2. They removed friends or closed their Facebook account.
3. They respond with short messages or short statements.
If you’re on the other side and you’re the one who’s feeling lonely and you’re reading this right now, your loneliness stems from feeling low self-worth.
Somewhere along the line you’ve convinced yourself that you’re not worthy of time and attention from your friends. Perhaps you may even feel that you suffering because it’s in your destiny or karma.
You are worthy of love, time and friendship and feeling sorry for yourself will not help your situation. In fact, if anything it makes people feel more like they want to stay away from you.
You have to find a way of becoming like a product in demand. When your self value changes, people will naturally want to be around you. Then you’ll have the opposite problem where you’ll want some time to yourself. (A nicer problem to have in my opinion!)
Here’s some quick ways to stop feeling lonely.
1. Change the way you see and value yourself.
2. Become more proactive and don’t just make friends, create NETWORKS.
3. Pamper yourself frequently to remind yourself that you are worth it! (No L’oreal advertising here I promise!)
You will never have the loneliness issue again if you can master two things. i) The way you value yourself and the way you present yourself to others. ii) Mastering the way others perceive you.
The feeling of loneliness is all in your head. It’s not because people don’t love or care about you, it’s because YOU BELIEVE they don’t. When you change those beliefs the loneliness will evaporate very quickly.